to the guy who is the train equivalent to the Princess & the frigging Pea
I keep my laptop bag on my, well, on my lap. feet flat on the floor of the train. the train hasn't even started yet....and this jackass in front of me. possibly late 40s turns around and growls at me:
"GET YOUR KNEES OUT OF MY BACK"
what the? didn't see that coming. especially since my knees weren't in his goshdarned back. nor was I shoving my bag into the back of the seat.
I say "pardon?"
he (standing up): "get your knees off the chair and out of my back!"
me (calmly): "sir, my knees are nowhere near your back"
he (sitting down huffily like a little frigging bitch and rustling his paper): *mumble*
me (under my breath): looks like we have the Princess & the Pea here
he: "Excuse me?"
me: "i said my knees are not in your back"
silence. him slamming his fricking back into the seat to 'remove my knees'
at this point my irish is up. got it?
okay. conductor comes to collect tickets. and fuckwit whines "tell her to put her knees down"
conductor says "her knees are down."
and so I say "looks like we have a regular Princess and the Pea sitting here."
fuckwit (FW): "EXCUSE ME??"
ME: "I said 'IT LOOKS LIKE WE HAVE A REGULAR PRINCESS AND THE PEA' HERE"
FW: "I PAID FOR THIS SEAT!"
me: "you might want to refrain from implying that I didn't, Princess"
me: "would you like to se my $291 monthly pass?"
FW (sits down like a little bitch.)
cut to when we're out of tunnel.....
FUCKWIT'S CELL PHONE RINGS AND - get this - HE ANSWERS IT!
me (mumbling): oh but talking on the cell is A-okay
FW (turning around): "WHAT DID YOU SAY TO ME?!" (serious rage in his eyes. puh-lease. amateur.)
me: "was I talking to you?"
FW: "yes you were!"
me: " 'fraid not"
now..... at this point, our dearly beloved Fuckwit, flies off the handle and runs out of the seat and down the aisle to tattle on me. his fellow seat partner turns to look at me, shakes his head and laughs...
a minute later FW comes back and sits down
conductor comes, looks at my knees and says "they aren't touching you, sir"
and so right now I am laying in wait til he gets off the train so I can snap a photo.
what'd i do!?!?
::: plunked in on my treO:::